Expand Your Boundaries and Limitations. Sometimes we strategize, think, discuss, project, and all to consider what might happen, but never move. Just the other day I had a poignant conversation with my 14-year old son about fear. I asked him is he had ever heard what people say “fear” stands for, and he had not. I shared the saying, “False evidence appearing real,” that is when the discussion went to another level. He shared some of his fears to which I replied that they have not happened making them not real. However, those fears keep him in the same place, getting the same result, feeling the same way, and hoping something else will happen. You see, fear is comfortable because we know what will or will not happen in that zone. You know the feeling, conversations, complaints, routine, and general happenings in Fearville because you have lived there for a while and moving would be too much. Fearville has its own boundaries and limits.
Motivate or Isolate. What I shared with my son was this, “Fear can either motive or isolate.” When we hold onto fear we do the same things, but we close ourselves off to greater possibilities, kill our own dreams, impact our own health, decrease our own vitality, and often live with regret and that is isolating. Isolating because you see the same things in Fearville, have the same conversations with other residents of Fearville, experience the same emotions, and don’t grow from it. On the other hand, fear can motivate you to discontinue the cycle you have started and move to a new location emotionally, spiritually, financially, and physically. When you see what you have created you can be motivated to create a new scenario for yourself. You can write a new story for how your life looks from today forward. It is all matter of choice. You are the author of your autobiography page-by-page, day by day, and can write what you like, but it takes something else. Courage and faith.
Courage. Confidence, and Faith. I believe that it takes courage to have faith, to take a leap into the unknown. Interestingly, we think we know what will happen each day and all we can do is plan for it, other folks can interrupt the day, unexpected things happen all the time, and all we can do is face them. Taking a leap requires courage because courage means you are doing something that is scary, but you do it anyway not knowing the outcome. To go through with courage takes faith, not in a religious context at all. Faith means you are taking action with confidence and trust that what you are doing is correct. So, you plan and now it is time to grab courage and leap with faith, faith is that action.
Get Out of the Nest. How did I end my interaction with my son? How does this all come together? I encouraged him to be like a baby bird, they might be afraid to fly, but they will not get what they want or need in life if they do not take a leap. Might they get bruised? Yes, it is a part of the process. However, you never see a gang of birds walking along the street hanging out because they decide not to fly. They kept jumping until they got the hang of it. I told him he is brilliant, smart, intelligent, and imply needed to leave Fearville and jump. Me too. I have my own fears, thoughts, and emotions, but every new phase in life presents the opportunity to leap, if you so choose. Graduate school is done, new contracts are in full swing, planning to move, and coordinating life in general can be fear inducing. However, I see them as opportunities to fly to a new place literally and figuratively. You can stay in the same place or see where the winds will take you as you learn to fly.
Take a leap of faith.